TOBY NG

Post-Wedding Gratitude

Thank you!

For those who came to our wedding to share our special day with us, those who couldn't make it, or those who just showed their support and congratulated us, THANK YOU, from the bottom of our hearts. We are overwhelmed by your kindness and generosity, and we hope you had a pleasant evening! This blog is an extension to the Thank You cards, so if you have not received one, it is definitely on the way! The goal of this post is to add some additional words. Reading is optional!

As a flashback to my wedding vow and speech, there are two things I would like to bring back. The first is to live in the present, to enjoy each moment as it comes. The second is that everyone deserves happiness. These two concepts are both connected because I believe true happiness needs presence (not "presents" but those are nice too). Happiness is different for each person and sometimes it can be different to understand others based on their choices, but that's okay. Happiness is something we need to find for ourselves. Let's not worry about other people for the moment.

It is best to be happy in the present, not in the past or future. You cannot change the past or the future. Happiness from the past leads to a longing for that past, comparing the past with the present. Often the past is partially reconstructed and is usually better than it actually was. Once you bring the memory into the present, you compare the two and you reminisce. The "good old days" will likely make you less happy today, because it is a comparison: "the grass is always greener on the other side". This is the same for the future. We create great expectations of ourselves and maybe of others. Future happiness is typically a best-case-scenario. Once we get there, if we actually get there, it may not be what we expected. Expectations can be dangerous to happiness, especially if they are overly optimistic. 

Instead of thinking about past failure and being pessimistic about the future, why not enjoy each moment as it comes? Instead of worrying about writing unique Thank You cards, I decided I would share this idea because I want to make the most of this moment. It is my way of practicing how to write and communicate my ideas, and I do enjoy trying to put my thoughts into text to better articulate the message I want to communicate. I never imagined life to turn out this way, and when I look back at all the things I thought I would do, I don't think this was part of my vision. To be fair, I never even considered competing in badminton nationally, let alone going to the Olympic Games. Many people have supported me on this path and I am extremely grateful. Now it's my turn to give back, and that truly brings me happiness.

I do hope that our wedding brought you happiness, even if gave you a moment to reminisce. Instead of wishing things were better, being grateful often centers us. Acceptance brings closure and a moment of happiness. Each time I remember competing at the Olympics, I smile and remember how great it was to be a part of that moment, instead of wishing that I had a better result. I accepted that I did the best I could, and that brings me closure. When I think back to my wedding, I smile and remember how great that day was. I was very grateful to have so many people support us on our special day. Although I cringe a bit when I think about performing the song for Carmen, I'm content that it was a one-time performance and I don't need to do something like that again! 

In conclusion, thank you all, once again, and I do hope you can take a moment right now to take a breath and find that stillness that comes with overwhelming gratitude. As much as life can get better, life can also get worse, so I am thankful for where I am right now. Happiness can be in our control, so I do hope you all find that happiness, whatever it may be. Thank you and God bless!


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